Hmm...

So yeah

about today 

not much heh 

slept till quite late cause i pulled an all-nighter. 

ugh 

study plan failed,

didn't really went as planned. 

ah 

I know what's going on...

but hey,

if you don't have a choice, 

then why not just follow it? 

It's not how you planned, 

but maybe it's meant to be? 

=\

well at least that's a degree?

you should really think twice you know? 

I'll be here if you need any advises. 

Don't think too much 

everything'll be fine. 

有時候有時候

還沒好好的感受

雪花綻放的氣候

我們一起顫抖

會更明白什麼是溫柔

還沒跟你牽著手

走過荒蕪的沙丘

可能從此以後學會珍惜

天長和地久

有時候有時候

我會相信一切有盡頭

相聚離開都有時候

沒有什麼會永垂不朽

可是我有時候

寧願選擇留戀不放手

等到風景都看透

也許你會陪我看細水長流

完全爱上了这首歌

也许不是我放不下

而是

我选择了留恋不放手

昨天

跑了两场会议

啊

都不怎么顺利似的

算了吧

尽力了

发生了一件很奇怪的事

去和回时都坐跟一样的人

哈哈

还是两个双胞胎

而且她们还认识我的朋友们

可却都不认识我

我当然也不认识她们啦

哈哈

I don't know whether you're still reading my blog or not 

but after what I've told you yesterday 

I did some thoughts on the whole thing 

and myself as well 

Well

my life is indeed boring and really lifeless

but I try to appreciate every single opportunity given to me

and tried to achieve them 

just like what i thought when we first started.

I didn't regret trying tho 

I know you have a lot of defenses 

But have you ever, ever,

for once,

stop defending yourself with excuses and those feelings 

that you said you have 

and just think, 

think of what have you achieved in the past 20 years 

it's real funny you know 

looking back at our conversation 

you said you look at my like a lil brother rather than someone you could rely on 

well I think I'm better of being an elder one instead 

Couldn't imagine what would you think and do 

if I'd let you know the truth behind all of both of us stuffs.

hahh.

darling you really need to think and decide

and never ever tell me you're old already 

cause if you still can take life for granted 

then you're never old 

cause that stuffs for the young 

your life's really enjoyable and relax you know

well at least you can still stay at the home watch drama for whole day?

hahaha

what I think you should do right now 

is to stop, 

Stop feeling sad and stuffs, stop thinking,

start doing

You're still young, really 

you don't have to take life's opportunity cost into account sometimes

cause you knew that there're still gonna be 

shit tones of people there for you if you fuck things up 

which you always does 

sorry, didn't mean and not gonna give any explanation still

So 

Got a package while writing this post,

it's an interactive magazine from Academy of Art University,

one of the oldest and most prestigious art university in the world 

which i got an offer like 2 years ago.

They still didn't wanna give up persuading me to go over tho

HAHAHAHA. 

amazing. 'nuff said. 

But 

this new generation of magazine is really amazing 

it somehow rekindled my most fundamental 

interest in art, modelling, fashion, and animation

which made me fell so deep in love to them 

when i first started all these shit 

maybe i got bored.

nope 

i got bored. 

i'll think again tho. HAHA

Ok

have to get off to prepare to go qb 

study study study 

work work work

life life life 

 p/s: sis, i'm still amazed by qing xing. HAHA

Day One Entry: Oct 28, 2012

Time flies, memories stays

Thank you sis,

You really made my day. Haha. 

And of course some of the those awesome friends of yours. 

Hehe

Ya la I know that you're trying to wake me up 

And cheer me up. 

I'm trying. Alright? 

Haha. 

Good night. 

Time to get back to work now. 

=)

Jellyfish sucks. 

Good life

Everything's gonna be alright,

We don't even have to try 

It's always a good life 

=)

Ok fuck that. 

I'm tired of pretending to be happy d. 

Thank you so much sis. 

I'm really happy these few days. 

And your friends were really delighting. 

Everything don't have to be complicated. 

Really,

This is really a good life. 

So here I am,

With them,

My new found friends. 

In her room,

Discussing musics, interest, techs,

Sharing our own opinions and stuffs.

Ah,

Damn it. 

I really wished to learn piano

That's gonna be that one regret that I'll never be able to accomplish. 

And 

Don't think she's still reading my blog already. 

And twitter?

Haha. 

The whole point of her twitter is that she could share what she wanted to say to me,

Only me, that's why... 

Maybe it's just me,

Ok. It's just me 

But I don't care. 

I shouldve been retarding for like so long already 

To be honest 

It's really hard to move on. 

And I can't move on 

That's the fact. 

Sigh. 

You're really one of a kind 

Out of the 7 billion homo sapiens out there 

Why you? Why me?

=(

Meeting this morning
Headache.
So headache
And stressed
Ugh
Ma de

I wish you're here.
Or at least
You could be here.

Baby Good Night

I think it was the decision of above,

to let me know the reason behind all those. 

baby, 

it's not both of us fell in the same shit 

it's just some wrongdoings of others. 

but i guess it doesn't matter anymore. 

cause 

it'd never be this way if i knew it earlier. 

But 

i guess that, 

i'm pretty fine with this

yeah

just beware of people around you

greed can really kill you. 

somehow, someway. 

Maybe,

knowing the truth finally 

made me felt a lot relieved. 

mhmm 

it definitely does. 

i felt much better right now 

they said love is blind, 

oh baby 

you're so blind. 

夢想再大 

你還是看不見我 

愛的再深 你還是愛自己多 

你不會懂 傷口真的會痛 

你心裏的宇宙 我不在任何角落 

世界再大 你還是原地不動 

說的再多 

你從來也沒聽懂

Staying is no longer an option

I don't matter anymore. 

只是会觉得不值得，

不知

如果让我早一点知道那些事情的话

你也许还会留在我身旁

也许天真的是我吧。

他真的很厉害。

我输了。

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hai sis, 

damn you -.- 

The ink won't get off. 

Thank you so much for the night ok? 

Nahhh 

I won't emo liao 

you're right tho, 

at some point. 

I'll reconsider of what you've said. 

"谨慎小心，待人和蔼可亲，

外冷内热的梅花鹿做事谨慎小心，

很少鲁莽行事，

这类型的人有完美主义倾向，

自尊心又强，

最瞧不起懦弱的表现，

更不喜欢让别人看到自己的缺点，

有时外表看似冷漠，其实却有颗温柔坦诚的心，

是慢热型的人，

偶尔也会被周遭的人或事感动得落泪，

也不排除歇斯底里发泄情绪的时刻。"
真的吧，其实还蛮准的
结果
就成了人家伤害的对象。
哈哈

關於愛情，我們永遠都是新手...

留下一些帶走一些，改變一些被改變一些
而學不會的，也許是你最堅持或最難割捨的那些

總是學不會 再聰明一點
記得自我保護 必要時候講些 善意謊言
總是學不會 真愛也有現實面
不是誰情願 就能夠解決

dayumm

You know what,

You're really selfish. 

but 

ik hou van je 

ik neem je mee, neem ye mee op reis

That's all. 

baby good night.

从新开始

从今天起

从新开始

什么都不理不管了

啊

想继续学荷兰语

还有韩语

既然买了书就不要浪费掉

哈哈

还有我的德语

其实我还蛮有潜质在语言的方面的嘛

哈哈哈

哈咯姐姐

欢迎回来

我们要去get high! 

LOL! 

还有读书

很多很多买回来的书都放置在一旁

啊

算了，

没有童年没有乐趣的人生

就让它没有吧。

今天起来发现眼睛肿的像鱼丸一样

吓到我一跳

打了只针后好了许多

最近真的很压力

咖啡也喝得特别多

觉也少睡了许多

身体给我个明示吧

看回去

其实你被我影响的也还蛮多的

哈哈

不知到要开心还是伤心好

The first photo you sent me 

The first photo I sent you, haha. 

All of the books here worth at least 3 thousands LOL.

The first design where everything's so different

Final design. Good thing we diverted.  

Don't worry. 

Just reminiscing the past memories.

Everything happened so quick,

Just before the strike of midnight
you said this could be the good life
then you said goodbye.

Haha.

How'd we get here today

Seriously.

But meh, 

What's done cannot be undone. 

I hope we're cleared about 

what both of us are right now

if you still wanna stay in the company

guess it's time for you to come back to work?

Well your boss ain't someone you could mess with at work 

nahh just joking

I'm way too soft-hearted. 

I guess. 

I hope I don't have to repeat these again. 

Oh and,

Hi jane, 

Don't sad le please. 

You need to stay strong k? 

*man up* 

Haha

Come on,

you knew i tried a lot to make you feel better

and you know 

i'm kind of in the same situation as well, 

no,

i'm worse. 

So stop thinking,

cause overthinking only leads to negative results.

That's the modest thought i can give you. 

And that's fucking proven. 

=D

If you still stay like this i'll post up those drawings 

you drew for me 

when we were together. 

HAHAHA 

and yes i have them 

try me. =P

Jolin's new album! 
Okay I'm still her fan. =D
and her lyrics are still
so 
true. 

Okay. 

That's about it 

I guess. 

Well

Unless I would wanna rant more,

which the fuck I don't. 
and damn,
bill came out. 
overspent way too much already. 
fucking hell 
i don't give a damn care. 
LOL
jkjk

Must. Cut. Down. Spending
Must. Cut. Down. Coffees

Day One Entry: Oct 23, 2012

A conversation that sums it all.

I think 

I've reach my limit already.

Maybe it's time.

Good night. 

三点了，

多一下子就要考试了，

其实

真的很紧张

最近都很压力

很忙碌

很衰

结论是

都还蛮倒霉的

不知道

到底做错了什么

真的咯

妈的

我到底是怎么了？

也许是上天要试验我吧，

要这样子想才能，

不然真的是够悲观了

离开就离开吧

反正我没有对不起我自己

从开始就说好了

也许是

投入了许多

改变得连我自己都认不得自己了

算了吧

努力过就算了

公司已经够忙了

衰也够衰了

真的不应该继续这样子

诶， 

你要怎样就怎样吧

开心就好。

拍手给你，

给你那打死不联络得精神

还有

那恐怖得善变能力。

让我大开眼界了

我真的不应该这样容易相信人了

哈，

真的是害死我自己

也许

感情这方面真的是谁先认真谁就先输了。

真的有想过回英国

也许我在那边无忧无虑的生活

才会让我真的开心

可是还是算了吧

我有我的目标

我还有支持我的人

姐，你说对吗？哈哈

谢谢你骂醒了我

还有一个很特别的人

淑娟啊淑娟，

怎么这次你跟我都掉进了一样的坑了啊

哈哈

妈的我们还真有够倒霉。

就当作成长吧

是的

我还是觉得思想>年龄

好了，

牢骚完了，

继续作最后的冲刺吧

刘亦峻，

你要坚强加油！

你还有很多东西要你亲自去做的

妈的不可以这样没用。

希望等下考试

顺利闯关！

Teehee! 

deja vu?

nahh 

What's next.

I think I, 

should start to get used to being selfish, 

should start to get used to live alone, 

should start to not depend on someone else, 

should start to love myself. 

You, 

ran into my world, 

took everything from me, 

and step away from me. 

All the stuffs you've done, 

rendered me helpless, restless and hopeless. 

I miss it when everything used to be simple, 

when it's just you and me in front of the phone,

I just can't get over you... 

I felt so useless right now, 

especially when i needed your support the most. 

Sigh. 

I will still learn Korean, 

I will still go to Korea, 

and Blue Reef, 

and I wanna realize all the pinky promises we have made. 

All the bad things seems to crash landed on me lately.. 

I really wish that you're here to face them with me. 

"I wanna share everything with you" 

This is the first promise you made to me. 

Is this still valid? 

I miss you, but I know I must stop myself from doing that,

from now on at least. 

I feel so devastated right now... 

And yet everything to you seems so easy... 

Subsidiary company registration failed, 

examinations failed, 

relationship failed, 

parents failed, 

Everything chose to stop working at this very moment, 

It's horrendous 

I don't know how to accept them at one time. 

I feel so breathless.
I feel so vulnerable. 

Speechless. Really.

Lesson of the century: age of a person clearly doesn't reflect the level of maturity.

I shouldn't have cared at all.

 I was thinking of being nice by caring more. 

Didn't expect to be treated like a pathetic beggar trying to get some attention.

I totally did not see this coming. 

I've no idea why would anyone favor ugly endings.

And when will you stop listening to others and start having your own thoughts?

I'm so sick of this already.

Yeah you're right, he's right, she's right, she's right, they're right...

But I'm never right...

So in end,

Which one is your decision?

I gave you my trust from the start.

I thought everything is going to be ok.

I thought you're different.

Yeah you're still different tho.

I thought its going to be very simple.

Apparently

I was wrong. I was naive.

All you have done is making empty promises and did nothing, 

also, complicate everything up when you said you just want a simple day? 

I'm sorry. I don't comprehend simple in such way.

No, simple doesn't have to be comprehended in any form of method.

Not to mention, leaving me when i needed you the most.

Come on.

Even a friend won't do this.

And

Can't a friend cheer the other friend when she's having an upset time?

No. 

You thought that's weird and dragging me and stuffs.

I was amazed by how much a simple caramel macchiato would influence you.

You told me you cared about how others said, 

and you blamed me for not thinking whether you'd wanted that beverage or not.

But i thought this is our matter, 

shouldn't you be caring how I am going to feel and thought of than your co-workers?

Then have you thought of how I'm going to feel after this?

I told you I just wanted to cheer you up.

It's as simple as that.

And yet you told me you're afraid that I'm the immature one.

Guys who went to clubs are often the same. 

Well at least I proved this wrong. 

But meh. 

Doesn't matter anymore.

I'm so sorry sis.

I know I can't drink le yet I still drank so much.

I just wanna wake myself up. Just once in a while?

I should've listened to you...

Thank you.

I think I'll just keep you as a co worker.

You finally made me give up.

 How amazing. 

You deserve a medal on that.

 Nope. No joke.

Guess I really have to buckle up. 

Good thing I don't get affected by others word so easily?

 Well... Except those unfortunate ones.

Duh

And hey,

Cheer up kay? 

Don't think le. 

Everything will be ok sooner or later.

Don't say you're in the same shit ok? 

Cause that was me. 

At least you had someone who treated you like a princess for this two months? 

Well maybe your way of being a princess is different 

but to that guy he's done some of the impossible stuffs 

he'd never ever thought of doing them for the past 20 years.

We're both the same type of person.

 We didn't want to lose. 

And we certainly don't like the feelings of losing.

Got so hard, 

to get out from the past nightmare of relationship. 

And get into another one again.

How funny

It's like going back to the same, again. 

It's just this time, it's just me.

Do you still feel like starting all over again?

 We'll have to go through a proper introduction again then. Ah

You have no idea.
how sad am I 
and how 
fucked up I am right now

At least I learnt two important lessons this while.

Second one was, never ever give your heart and trust the other first.

Forget it, 
I have finished ranting and complaining

Fruitful not

I'm feeling centered today =D

Not a fruitful day at all. 

I literally, and practically wasted whole day doing nothing at all.

How great?

Ugh. 

Woke up at 2 and rushed my way to qb

only to find no place to even sit in Starbucks 

and i had to go squander around the mall...

Wasted loads of time in the arcade actually =(

I guess I got pretty addicted to the game already

Damn 

Gonna stop myself from playing already. 

pfftt..

Anyway

Saw your tweets rather late..

Mhmm 

What's going on?

What happened?

I'll cheer you up tomorrow kay? =)

Teehee

Had to settle some stuffs tomorrow

And meeting at 7. 

Don't know if i can wake up or not 

Oh ya,

dad finally force me to use the new number 

damn i really don't wanna change a new number 

so fucking troublesome.

So yeah 

that concludes today 

Oh! 

I got myself a free beverage, 

again -.-

Mhmm...

had to meet her tomorrow,

i mean, 

the other her... 

I hope I can hold myself.

Hey, 

I don't know what's going on but 

I'll be that guy that you can rely on 

and 

rant on 

and 

trust on

and 

I won't fucking be your burden 

=D

kk

OH! And

This time help you do your work 

Know you're not in the form 

But, 

No next time kie? =P

Let's create our own little piece of heaven. 

You had my heart 

Mission. Stop. Myself. From. Coffees. 

Commence. From. Tomorrow. Onward

Ok i can't do it. Or not -.-

Kkk

had to ciaoz.

Petty pace

So yeah,
It's a rather relaxing day like what she said..

Except the fact that i was fucking waken up by my ex
in the morning
5am...
Just to find fights with me.
Wow
Really...

Took me a good 45 minutes plus to go back to sleep..
why the fuck are you doing this
you think it's fun?
Screw you.

Anyway
woke up afterwards.
Did some web-browsing and stuffs
And yeah
Dato Redzuan finally replied...
the reply we got never fails to amazed me
just how much business prospect he's looking at
and how the dynamics of his questions were like
mhmm
Deputy Secretary General of UNAM..
I'm so gonna look forward in meeting him..
Hey,
you wanna join us when we meet him? =P
yeah, you XD.

Anyway,
went to study Tort Law at starbucks
Had chicken pie and cappuccino
well
i wanted to get blueberry cheesecake
but i didn't have a proper meal since morning
so yeah -.-.
chicken pie it is =D

Mhmm
Didn't get to facetime tonight
Mehhh...
I wanted to tell you something actually
But i forgot them earlier -.-
Fineeeeeee
guess i'll just tell you tomorrow night then. =O

Guess it's a pretty simple day today afterall
Hah.

Must .Not . Overthink =D

Isn't it?

把一切都交给我

把你的手接我

不要想太多 

=DDDDDDDDDDD

DDDDDDDDDDD

DDDDDDDDDDDD

Kkkk i'm high again.

Good night world 

Good night you =D

mhmm maybe i should change my tumblr theme. =O

Afterlife

So yeah. 
Been busy settling exams and stuffs.

Vena vena vena vena.... 
So much stuffs to do, 
So little time... 
Now tell me, 
How hard can your life be compared to mine...
I'm really starting to stress out already. 

Officially screwed up my Contract Law, again. 
yikes. Not good at all... 

I really could use a good rest. 
At some point perhaps... 

Hi dad and mum. 
I am really saddened by the news. 
Why won't you both put in some effort to patch things up...
It's been a really hard time for me already...
And this news is really hitting me hard.. 

Hi god. 
I don't normally believe in you 
but seriously.. 
you really want me dead don't you? 

So she called and scolded me a bunch loads of bullshits
Hahah.
So i'm the motherfucker who made you felt that you're being a fool now? 
Tell me, 
How foolish you can be? 
Enjoying and fooling around with someone who gave you
his world, his words, his love and care, and most preciously, 
his trust... 
Now who's the retard right now? 
But whatever,
I don't really wanna know already.
It's all over already.

So everything went back to normal already.
I guess? 
Still patching things up I guess...

Hey, 
I like how you support me the way it is right now 
Don't ask me whether is it worth it or not,
and no, 
don't ask me why wouldn't i give up or let go.
I told you
I don't and never will make a promise easily. 
I gave you my words, and I will make everything fine and alright 
like what i've been saying
Everything will be alright. Maybe not today, but eventually. 
Yes. 
This is my dogma. 
Always been the same. 
It's always worth all the works 
when it's just you and me 
sharing our days 
our feelings 
our thoughts 
our supports...
Even a simple "everything will be alright" or "don't think too much" 
would be so much sufficient to make me feel better.
I mean,
a hell loads better. 
It's just as simple as that...

你说得对，
有些事情不需要说白，
没说明的不代表不存在。
彼此心里明白就好了
简简单单就可以了不好了吗？

You've never found out doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
And yes
Both of us just wanted a simple day. 

=D 
幸福就要互相扶持互相關心


I miss blueberry cheesecake
and cappuccino 
Imma get them tomorrow. 
Teehee

Must however cut down the amount of coffees
=\ 
I'm so addicted to everything right now. 

Nope, I can't.

Okay. 

Finished emo 

Finished blog

Finished charging

Back to life

Back to reality

Back to Vena 

Back to books. 

I wanna get a tat on my leg 
And perhaps a pierce at my left ear?
Meh 
This is never going to happen. 
=\